Why I don't Identify as a Feminist

Anyone who knows me will not be surprised to see me writing this. But for those of you who don’t know me, SURPRISE! I don’t identify as a feminist!

Now, before you go judging me and call me a woman hater, I’d like to point out how that is exactly part of the reason I don’t call myself a feminist. Feminism is supposed to advocate for the equality of all genders, not just women. However, it has become a women’s movement. In fact, you could probably say it was always a women’s movement since it became popular to help women be treated equal to men and arose before non-cis people even had their existence acknowledged by modern society. Even the root of the word is based in women. If the goal was gender equality, why center the term on only one gender? Because of reproductive rights? Because of representation? Because of stereotypes? Because of not having the same privileges others receive? Believe it or not, those aren’t just women or feminine problems. Those are minority problems.

So, you might think then that feminism is still a necessary term because women do face these issues. I disagree, and here’s why. Speaking up for access to safe reproductive health options, stopping sexism, and ending discrimination is not a title worthy cause. Its called being a decent human being. It’s called being mindful of the fact that other people live different lives, are faced with different circumstances, and need to be treated with respect regardless. Just like how you don’t parade around saying “I’m an ally” when you support queer rights, it’s literally just shouting to the world that you think you deserve attention and applause for being a DECENT PERSON.

I do agree that in order to get things done, we need organizations or movements to facilitate the process. I think feminism was a great movement in the past for doing that when it focused on things like women voting and living independent lives. I think in modern society we’ve moved beyond that. Feminism has become too wide of a term to be of good use anymore, the gender equality movement has moved beyond it. Nowadays it seems to be focused on reproductive rights, so why not label it that since that’s what so many feminists focus on?

For the feminists who focus on issues in other cultures, such as fighting female genital mutilation, again, trying to prevent kids from having their bodies cut up in unsterile environments is a basic human rights thing, and it’s not just happening to “women” either. What about the kids in first world countries who are born intersex and have their bodies cut up and changed to force them into the binary system our society runs on? They deserve to live freely and be themselves just as much as any woman. What about binary and non-binary trans people? Guess what…they do too.

Don’t take me the wrong way. I’m not trying to say women’s issues don’t have a place, and I’m not trying to say anyone’s problems are invalid. I’m just saying feminism has changed, and so has the world we live in, but the label identifier of feminism has not. Feminism can mean either, like I said previously, a decent human being, it could mean a woman who just wants some respect, or it could mean a cis woman who doesn’t like trans people and wants the freedom to get an abortion. The first one you don’t need a label for, and the other two I don’t identify with, so look at that, I’m not going to identify as a feminist.

I am all for reproductive rights. I am all for ending stereotypes, sexism, genital mutilation, etc. But, I also believe we need to stop thinking in terms of sexism as men vs. women. I believe just because your primary sex organs are internal doesn’t mean you’re a woman or others should default to treating you as one. I don’t believe you should chose to not hire someone because of what is or isn’t between their legs, and if you do hire them, you can’t use their genitalia in your decision on how much to pay them. You shouldn’t be allowed to cut up a child because they don’t meet your, or even society’s, expectations. These things shouldn’t be an issue, but they are. So, yes, we need to work on fixing them. We need to work on fixing a lot of other things too though. But, if you want to do these things and call yourself a feminist in the process, go for it. Just please understand and respect why I will not.