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Santa, Makeup, and Pets

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Last night I was trying to figure out what other things I could add in or write about, and I decided my dreams would be a good problem. I tend to have pretty vivid dreams with linear plots, so they kind of just end up being quirky, nonsensical stories. Usually when I get a noteworthy one, I send it to my boyfriend or tell it to some unsuspecting victim. Fortunately, I’ll typically type out the most interesting ones to save and reread later when I’m bored, so I have a couple ready to share today.

I decided I’d try to post more interesting dreams when they occur, so I was also debating if I should create a new page exclusively for dreams, or just add them to a different page. I settled on adding them to the Rants page, since they’re like short subconscious rants about nonsense.

Like for one of them, I found out the REAL Santa lives in Alvin, Texas. He lives in a metal hut with a small fenced in backyard, but the backyard is 100% filled with an impressive VHS Christmas collection. He also lives next to a small church that has complete metal, lockdown window coverings, because of this one dude who tried to break in once and kill everyone inside. Apparently, Santa is a vegan. He told me how he gives extra coal to people who throw eggs at things, because they’re wasting that baby chick’s life without even eating it. Basically, that whole Santa dream was just him telling us about his history and various stories of his past

In another dream, my mom was making an elaborate dinner in my tiny apartment, and my brother invited his girlfriend over. She was really weird and had these thick layers of liquid makeup all over her face and tummy, so Anthony was trying to help her get the excess off by giving her all my things to wipe it off on. It started with her taking my toothbrushes and rubbing them in her tummy and face makeup, and then she started taking my shirts and wiping herself in those too. Next thing I know, is I found her rubbing her body into my bed, but somehow after all of this she was still dripping with makeup. She said she saw a swimsuit in my closet and asked if she could use it to take a bath and wash herself off, and I was just like, you already ruined my whole apartment, why not ruin my swimsuit too? So, she took it and put it over the makeup dripping down her tummy (it was a one piece) and got into the bath and never washed her face.

The last dream I’ll share here was that I was back at my parents’ house, and I got two cats and two puppies. I didn’t have any stuff for them, so I went to the Home Depot. Some lady was selling handmade dog and cat bowls at the front, so I bought some from her. Then, when I went looking in the pet aisle, I didn’t know what kind of food to get for them, so I bought bird food. For my puppies and kittens. I couldn’t find any litter boxes for the cats either. So, I just got a bucket with dry cement mix. That’s it. I bought bird food and cement mix to take care of my animals.

I have a couple more dreams already typed out, but I’m going to save them for another post so this one doesn’t get too long. Usually they’re longer and more complex, but I kept waking up every few hours on the night I had these three dreams which is why they’re all so short. I hope you enjoyed them…

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